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Advice from a Parent
 So, here you are. You’ve finally gotten the confirmation from the people with degrees that, yes; indeed, your loved one has autism. If your experience was anything like mine, you’ve already been coping with the well-meaning skepticism of friends and family for some time. Or, perhaps, you’ve been going back and forth yourself, knowing something wasn’t quite right but not wanting to admit it to yourself. Maybe you’ve made that call to the Infants and Toddlers or Child Find program, or perhaps you’ve been going it alone.
Getting the diagnosis is a critical – and significant – step for you and your loved one. Now, it’s time to wipe those tears and get your game face on.
Below are a few tips on where to go from here:
- Investigate early, intensive intervention options for your loved one.
The label of autism can be a scary one for parents, but individuals with autism can have fulfilling, productive, happy lives with good, early, and intensive intervention. The sooner you get started, the better. Check out Therapies for a comprehensive list of options. Remember, when selecting therapies initially, there may be more than one option or combination of treatments that will work for your child. And, these may change over time. Click here to search for providers who can help.
- Investigate educational options for your child.
Your local public or private school system can give you an idea of what they have to offer. Options range from segregated, special education classes to full inclusion in the general education curriculum. Some parents opt for home schooling. Before you call your school system, you might want to call (410) 769-9500 or (866) 806-8400 to speak with our Resource Center Coordinator to plan what questions you should be asking.
- Read, read, read… and read some more.
Unless you’re already intimately familiar with autism, you’re going to need to get an education quite quickly. Check out our website for Articles and Book Nook for suggestions. One of the first books I read was Facing Autism by Lynn M. Hamilton; it helped me pinpoint some therapies and gave me an idea of what to expect. Check out the Internet for autism specific sites, but remember that there are a lot of controversial sites, therapies and theories out there. Do your research thoroughly.
- Join a support group in your area and perhaps online.
The Autism Society of America has chapters throughout the state of Maryland, and each hold regular meetings. If you plan to do home based interventions, you could join Families for Intensive Autism Treatment (FIAT). Support groups are a great way to meet other parents who have gone down this road before you and can give you an idea of what to expect and where to find the resources that you need. Also, the Internet is a great place to connect with families across the United States (and abroad) to talk about different experiences and therapies. I found out about Applied Behavioral Analysis through a post on Parent Soup!
- Start gathering a good group of providers for your loved one.
Our loved ones with autism have the need for a wide range of medical and behavioral services. It can be challenging to find the best medical provider for your loved one, or the most convenient dentist. Perhaps your child will need to see a neurologist to rule out seizures and for genetic testing. Maybe you want to investigate biomedical options for your loved one and you need to find the right medical practitioner. Other parents in your support group and the Pathfinders for Autism Resource Center are great resources for finding the right provider for your loved one. Click here to search for service providers.
- Make sure to take time for yourself and your entire family.
Chances are, your loved one with autism’s needs will quickly devour your free time, your attention and your financial resources. Be sure to make time for you, your spouse, and your other children (if you have them). Take time to meditate, go to the movies with your mate, spend quality time with your other children. Don’t be shy about asking for help. You can’t help your loved one with autism if you’re exhausted, depressed, or not dealing with your anger. Remember, the best gift you can give any child is a stable, happy home and family.
Alisa Rock
Pathfinders for Autism Board Member and parent of a child with autism
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